India vs Sri Lanka – Why the F*** are we still doing it?

India is playing against Sri Lanka, like we give a fuck about it. Still, I think total indifference about India Sri Lanka cricket series is kind of unfair.

First time the two played, we wrote a book about it. Built a temple in Ayodha and celebrated Indian team’s successful return with an entire festival.

Ramayana was the first series, where we were not pissed off about wives being present at the game. Ramayana is called mythology because I think it never happened. It must have been a series of 5 Test Matches, 7 ODIs and 3 T20s.

Some say, the best thing about India Sri Lanka series is that the live telecast is during day time.

When Sri Lankan Right Arm Spinners are bowling to Indian Right Hand batsmen, and yelling “Alle Alle Alle Alle Alle”, we are banging our heads on our laptops.

There are some idiots who follow India Sri Lanka series on websites like Cric Info, Cric Buzz, Rediff etc. These obsessed people are doing it only because India Sri Lanka series is a part of Indian Culture as much as Ramayana or Mahabharata. I think Sita haran was a conspiracy hatched by Sri Lankan Cricket board to make sure that we keep playing with them  forever. People say when Ravana died, his last words were “Shree Rama” but I think they were “Ranatungaaaa”.

The fun fact is that Ravana himself was an entire cricket team. All those stories about 10 heads strengthen my claim. Vibhishan was a mere umpire, who gave some wrong LBW decisions in our favor, since then deported to India, “Bhenc*** tu udhar hi jake reh na”. Shoorpanakha was an IPL cheerleader who was sacked for being involved in match fixing and all. Rama had a team full of monkeys and a hot headed vice- captain in Lakshman, but in the end was able to pull it off, because he was a cool headed captain, a bit like our MSD. Ultimately, we all have to agree that the whole series was for his trophy. Hanuman was promised a big role in the battle, sent for scouting, but actually ended up on the medical team.

To conclude, we strongly believe, India as a nation should give more importance to India Sri Lanka cricket series, because it is the most important part of our culture.

Also, when everything else will be banned in India, this is the only thing we can watch freely and without any fear.

|| Jai Shree Ram ||